Wednesday, March 31, 2010


I've spent the greater part of today racking my brain for something to say on buzz and to all 9 of my avid readers ( you are avid readers right?), but alas, I've come up empty. Could it be that I'm all thought out? lol no way, this is me we're talking about, the world's biggest over-thinker?( how fitting is my picture right now?). All I need is an opening line- or 20 attempts at a decent opener- and maybe some John Mayer to get me going and before you know it, I'll have something relatively amusing...

In all honesty, it's not the lack of something to say that has me scrambling for words. It's just that when you've chewed and chewed and chewed on a something as much as I've chewed on certain things, the last thing you want to do is open your mouth to expose the results of all that chewing (lol gross analogy right?). I don't know about you, but once I'm done chewing, I would much rather just.... swallow, accept the conclusions I've drawn and hope that I haven't eaten anything that will unsettle my stomach. At least this way,I'm the only person in danger; nobody gets grossed out by the content of my mouth!

There's a certain amount of vulnerability that comes with exposing yourself like that to people. I mean, sharing what you are thinking gives people a glimpse of who you are and how you think and feel about certain things, which is a little too much power for my liking. My phobia after revealing myself like that is the reaction I will get from my... audience; it's possible that they'll wrinkle their noses in disgust and run for the hills; the thought of that happening just cripples me. so, instead of opening my mouth at the most vulnerable times, I swallow whatever's in my mouth and let it poison my system. It just feels safer to do that than do be given the deer-in-the- headlights look.

But, I must be brave! No scars means no adventure and no great stories right?

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