Saturday, April 20, 2013

Moving Along

What does it mean to move on from a hurt that has been inflicted on you? I've been told that I don't do this. I've been told that I dig the hurt up and throw it back at people.

Yes, I suppose I do. But we forget one thing. When you hurt someone,  you scar them and that hurt changes your emotional features and how you see yourself and what you feel you deserve. You can forgive and be in right standing with someone but at the first sign of betrayal -even if it's a false alarm - the hurt comes pouring back afresh leaving you wondering how you ever thought you had "moved on". It boils down to remembering that pain and running away from ever feeling it again even if it means going on an angry rampage to chase the preditor away.

I feel I have moved on, but being treated the way I was before triggers that hurt again. and whether you like it or not I will always look over my shoulder hoping you won't deal that same blow again.

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